aghhhhhh I have to do a psych assignment and test revision tonight but I’m so tired and I just want to be in my warm clean sheets, clean clothes and read stupid girly magazines and dream about boys in bands :’(
Chances are, you’re not going to be alone forever.
Start spending more time with you. Laugh at your own jokes. Luxuriate in solitary silence. Walk. Read. Pamper yourself. Be as filthy and disgusting as you please. Learn the comfort of your own embrace. It’s a cliché but it’s true—you will love better once you’ve fallen in love with you. Sleep sprawled on the bed. Snore. When you wake up make eggs and bacon and eat them in bed on your own. Find things—big and small—that you love doing and do them everyday.
Focus on your job. Find a hobby. Do whatever the hell you want. Because when that day comes—the secret day you hold onto in the hidden recesses of your guts—you will have to compromise. You will have to think of someone else whenever you make a decision. You will have to share your bacon, and maybe they wont like it crispy besides, and you’ll have to adapt. You will have to sleep wedged between someone’s limbs. It wont be better and it wont be worse; it will be different, and you’ll have to learn to love it too.
boys are so cute and they dont know they’re so cute so they smile and smirk and cock their heads to the side and smile at you and they bite their lips and when they stretch, you can see their stomach, and that little line of hair going to their belly button and down to their crotch and some of them run their fingers through their hair and make it all messy on purpose and sometimes their hands are really big and that makes me happy